Episode 5 of Podenstein’s Lab takes you to Sweden’s Disgusting Food Museum for news on their barfy booze; goes behind the scenes for the hatchet/axe wielding, fuzzy suited, sorta’ true Bunny Man Legend; and goes back in time to find out why a woman in England was busy birthing bunny bits, among other animal chunks. Proving truth is grosser than fiction, it’s all the news you can use to freak out your friends, here in Podenstein’s Lab.
California duplex with mannequins in every room is listed for $650G: ‘To be sold as-is’
Five bedroom, three bath, a bunch of creepy mannequins, 650,000 dollars.
Breeder sells python with three smiley face emojis on it for $6,000
Happy face on the snake, sad face on your gerbil
Doctor appears in court video call while performing surgery
Plastic surgeon doing operation while appearing via Zoom for a traffic violation trial. That condo ain’t gonna pay for itself!
MEMENTO MORI CAN BE FUN
It’s a BS article about some lame collection. Not a single picture of an actual dead person. And they dare to call it art.
THE MAIN STORIES
MARK L. GROVES – THE BUNNYMAN OF FAIRFAX COUNTY
- In Fairfax County, Virginia, don’t go near the Clifton bridge near midnight on Halloween. You could end up the murder victim of…The Bunnyman.
- You see, in 1904, Clifton residents decided they didn’t want the insane asylum nearby anymore, so they had all the inhabitants bussed to Lorton Prison. Problem is, one of the busses crashed. Everyone on board was accounted for- except for one inmate.
- In the next few months, rabbits started showing up half-eat, disemboweled, even strung up like they were being processed to be eaten. Apparently, the asylum escapee was eating them.
- Then, on Halloween night, a group of teens were hanging out at the Clifton bridge, a cement tunnel-slash overpass built for the train tracks, big enough for folks to walk under.
- They saw a bright flash of light- and the next day, their bodies were found hanging from the bridge, gutted, victims of The Bunny Man.
That’s the urban legend. It has variants- including my favorite, where the escapee wears a bunny suit while committing hatchet/axe murders. So if Adam Green directed Donnie Darko…or maybe “The Trouble with Harry”…this would be his guy.
In the mid 1990’s, Brian Conley, an archivist for the Fairfax County government, decided that after enough people had come asking about records regarding the murders- from a little kid, to the teenagers, to women, to whomever the latest greatest take on the story had victimized, he would find out what the facts were. In 2002 he published his research paper, “The Bunny Man Unmasked:
The Real Life Origins of an Urban Legend,” for the Fairfax County Public Library.
In it he, exposes:
- There was never an insane asylum.
- Lorton Prison was built in 1910, six years after the origin story took place.
- In 1904, there were practically NO busses.
- And let’s be honest- if the kids saw a bright light flash right before they were all killed…who told the story about the bright light? A Rosebud moment right there.
But…Conley did discover an interesting fact in police records, one which runs the chance of having started the deliciously ridiculous Bunny Man legacy. Brian- whoever you are, I love you. Because you didn’t give up.
Conley through his readings- including a paper from a college student in the 1970’s about the bunnyman- he finds references to news articles about an attack. He looks them up. There were two newspaper references.
First one involved a couple parked in a driveway, woods surrounding it, and not THEIR driveway. Young couple. Huh, wonder what was on their mind?
Suddenly a figure comes running out of the woods, wearing a white suit with something on his head, yelling about getting off his property. He then throws a HATCHET into the windshield’s passenger side. Nobody hurt, though an article sights an interview they had with the original couple, neither particularly keen on talking about it, but relating that she had to comb glass out of her hair.
Second, another report not long after about a person- presumably male- in a bunny suit using an axe to hack at someone’s front porch columns.
Then POOF. No more Bunny Man. The person or persons in the suit were never caught. This was loooooong before gopro’s and home surveillance cameras. However, even with no Bunny Man, there were LOTS more Bunny Men. The urban legend took off like…a rabbit.
I had never heard of The Bunny Man before stumbling across it while looking for Podenstein’s Lab stories. Shame on me, because there are at least three movies: Bunnyman, Bunnyman 2, and Bunnyman Vengeance, plus a rock musical, t-shirts, hoodies, and even beer- yes, a beer- from BadWolf Brewing Company in Manassas, Virginia.
Chopper, hacker, cannibal, murderer, asylum escapee, hoppy lager, this is one bad rabbit who can even be summoned on Halloween night if you say, together…